She could never find anything in a supermarket, in her opinion they were just to big and had to much to choose from.
It would take her hours to find everything on her list and to make things worse, still walking around hours and close to closing time, strange and random men would come up to her and try to hit on her.
So she went to separate and more specialized places, she just picked up some bread from the bakery.
And right now she was getting the vegetables and fruits she needed from the ‘If it came out of the ground, we got it.’ Grocery store.
Which had a terrible name she thought, but she couldn’t think of anything that rhymed good with ground either except for found, hound, drowned, round and sound.
None of those would have made it sound any better, ‘If it came out of the ground, we drowned it.’ She thought followed by a chuckle.
Which made a random customer look oddly at her.
“Can’t a girl have some fun, for no visible reason?”
But the random customer pretended not to hear her.
She continues down the first aisle and checks her list.
“Apples, check!“
“Bananas, check!”
And she went on until she got to the next thing on her list.
“Strawberries?”
She looked around but thought they were nowhere to be found.
A small boy dressed up in some old looking rags and with a cape wrapped around his neck runs into the grocery store.
He runs to his mother, his shoes are altered with paper mache and look like big hairy feet.
“Mom!” he yells.
“What?” She replies.
His big feet block her cart “Quick! Say something random!”
She keeps looking around in search of strawberries, “Random.”
He was catching his breath and got up, “Wait, what?” he asks his mom but doesn’t wait for her to say anything.
“Are you asking me what I meant by Quick! Say something random? Or are you saying that from all the possible words or sentences you could possibly know, you randomly chose the word random?”
She stares at her son, wondering if that really came out of her, “Whatever.”
“So hows the hobbit thing going?“ She asks.
Which clearly irritated him, “Hobbit thing!?“
Again he doesn’t wait for her to say something, “You mean our reenactment of the battle of Helm’s deep in the underground parking lot?!“
While she is tapping her heel on the tile floor, “Yeah sure. Strawberries.“
“You mean that vacant office building?” She asks him.
“Yes, but were taking a break, one of the Orcs had an asthma attack and we had to call his mom.”
“Oh sounds like fun, where the hell do they keep the strawberries!” She replies not taking a single interest in what her son has been up to.
He got used to it so knew what he had to do, “Also we used real knifes this time, so far just minor cuts.”
It didn’t work, “I’m glad your having a good time.” She says, and grabs onto one of the grocery store clerks.
With an angelic voice she asks the clerk, “Excuses me where the fuck do you people hide the strawberries.”
“Oh uhm, in the miscellaneous accessory fruit section next to the plums.”
She lets go o the clerk and goes to get her strawberries.
“Strawberries, check!”
The boy walks to the front of her cart, “I think I should get back, can I have money for a soda.”
She picks her wallet from her purse and gives him some spare change,
“Don’t be late for dinner and say hi to your star wars friends from me.”
The little hobbit runs back to the front of the store, buys a soda and runs back to Middle-Earth.
When she too is finally out of there and packs the groceries in the car she remembers that she still has to pick up some meat at Mr. Butcher.
She slams the trunk shut, “God, I hate markets.”
It would take her hours to find everything on her list and to make things worse, still walking around hours and close to closing time, strange and random men would come up to her and try to hit on her.
So she went to separate and more specialized places, she just picked up some bread from the bakery.
And right now she was getting the vegetables and fruits she needed from the ‘If it came out of the ground, we got it.’ Grocery store.
Which had a terrible name she thought, but she couldn’t think of anything that rhymed good with ground either except for found, hound, drowned, round and sound.
None of those would have made it sound any better, ‘If it came out of the ground, we drowned it.’ She thought followed by a chuckle.
Which made a random customer look oddly at her.
“Can’t a girl have some fun, for no visible reason?”
But the random customer pretended not to hear her.
She continues down the first aisle and checks her list.
“Apples, check!“
“Bananas, check!”
And she went on until she got to the next thing on her list.
“Strawberries?”
She looked around but thought they were nowhere to be found.
A small boy dressed up in some old looking rags and with a cape wrapped around his neck runs into the grocery store.
He runs to his mother, his shoes are altered with paper mache and look like big hairy feet.
“Mom!” he yells.
“What?” She replies.
His big feet block her cart “Quick! Say something random!”
She keeps looking around in search of strawberries, “Random.”
He was catching his breath and got up, “Wait, what?” he asks his mom but doesn’t wait for her to say anything.
“Are you asking me what I meant by Quick! Say something random? Or are you saying that from all the possible words or sentences you could possibly know, you randomly chose the word random?”
She stares at her son, wondering if that really came out of her, “Whatever.”
“So hows the hobbit thing going?“ She asks.
Which clearly irritated him, “Hobbit thing!?“
Again he doesn’t wait for her to say something, “You mean our reenactment of the battle of Helm’s deep in the underground parking lot?!“
While she is tapping her heel on the tile floor, “Yeah sure. Strawberries.“
“You mean that vacant office building?” She asks him.
“Yes, but were taking a break, one of the Orcs had an asthma attack and we had to call his mom.”
“Oh sounds like fun, where the hell do they keep the strawberries!” She replies not taking a single interest in what her son has been up to.
He got used to it so knew what he had to do, “Also we used real knifes this time, so far just minor cuts.”
It didn’t work, “I’m glad your having a good time.” She says, and grabs onto one of the grocery store clerks.
With an angelic voice she asks the clerk, “Excuses me where the fuck do you people hide the strawberries.”
“Oh uhm, in the miscellaneous accessory fruit section next to the plums.”
She lets go o the clerk and goes to get her strawberries.
“Strawberries, check!”
The boy walks to the front of her cart, “I think I should get back, can I have money for a soda.”
She picks her wallet from her purse and gives him some spare change,
“Don’t be late for dinner and say hi to your star wars friends from me.”
The little hobbit runs back to the front of the store, buys a soda and runs back to Middle-Earth.
When she too is finally out of there and packs the groceries in the car she remembers that she still has to pick up some meat at Mr. Butcher.
She slams the trunk shut, “God, I hate markets.”
